For a good few years I have let my loved ones and closest friends see an ideal me. Now it’s time to be the real me. Not easy to do as people think they know you for real when they don’t. I have tried blogging before. I might have won the award for worst blogger ever, but I just wasn’t in the right space of mind to be me. I have sort of found the real me in the past three years. Some if it scares me, some of it makes me really proud and some of the real me has been disappointing to say the least.
So here is a short introduction to the real me or the real Julz.
I love my partner more than he loves me at the moment. Long story, but we are still good together. I hope that we get back to where we were some 11 years back, but seriously doubt it. I at least hope we will both embrace the new us and find the goodness we still have together. I am not sure you can be the same couple you were before having a kid. Keeping that in mind keeps me hopeful.
I am a mother. I thought I would be a better one. We got off to a really rough start though and it has taken some time to get on a better track. Was hoping to be further along by now, but I still have my bad parenting days. One thing I can say without a doubt is that my sweet son and I have a unique relationship. I wouldn’t change our start to his life for the world.
I am a working mom. I like to work. I am a social being and like getting away from the home during the day. I even like the break from being a parent. I took a year off last year from being in accounting to help other couples realise the dream of becoming parents. I even travelled to India 5 times in a year to do it and it was worth every second away from my precious family. I hate change and travel, well that kind of travel so to go to India of all places so often helped me get out of my comfort zone. I miss it. Alot. Not the leaving my family part, but the me being Julz part. Back to the real world of work and enjoying accounting again if that is at all possible.
I have loads of awesome friends. I chatted for a good few years on a fabulous site www.moomie.co.za and made some incredible friends. Some of them I have yet to actually meet, yet would help in a jiffy if they needed it.
Then there are my dearest of friends. I went to 9 schools so making friends wasn’t an issue. Keeping them was the hard part. I have my best friend who I don’t see enough. I have reconnected with two more friends in the past couple of years and am so pleased to have them back. Sad to have lost them for so long.
My partner is amazing. Friends for 21 years and partners for 11 of them. Almost 11 that is. We respect each other deeply. We have chosen not to marry and have a child out of wedlock. It suits us and we couldn’t have asked for a more amazing son. Neil the partner, is the most incredible father one could ask for, Dylan the most incredible son.
So that is my life really. We life in Cape Town in the Northern Suburbs. I have lived everywhere from Benoni to Boksburg SA, Norwich, UK, Germiston SA and finally Cape Town SA. My entire family apart from my dearest Gran lives in the UK. Not easy I tell you, but we have friends that are equivalent to family here so we are really lucky.
I have wanted to type blessed a few times, but just another thing about me, so not religious. I respect religion (all religion) but don’t have a religious bone in my body which brings me to my last point for this long and probably boring post. My body has not been too kind. We have it managed now and that is great, but it has taken a toll on all of us.
What I have found to be the best solution has been wine, plenty of it, therapy, lots of that too although it is depleting my wine money and last but not least medication to help me sleep which I may blog about here and there.
Oh very last post for tonight, I talk alot. I MEAN ALOT!
Chat again soon.